I dread writing! And I love eating cake. Boom! These are the most important things you need to know about me. Okay, so maybe I exaggerated a little bit; the writing part, not the cake, haha. However, I started writing my first novel almost 6 years ago, and even though I finished it a couple of years ago, I’ve been unable to let it go! I’m constantly rewriting; tweeking a passage here, adding a new chapter there…the thought of publishing it is so scary that I procrastinate and look for distractions. I read about people shelling out books in less than a month and I’m green with envy. How? They must be geniuses. Do you find that when you have a task you’re not looking forward to, let’s say working out, for example, because you’re so preoccupied with this task you find yourself dreaming that you’re doing it? In this dream, you get your lazy-self off the bed, don your running gear, head out the door and start pounding the pavement. You wave to your next door neighbour and you stop at the lights waiting for the ‘green walking-man’ to come on. You run with your head high, your arms pumping with intent. You’re listening to music and you have all the energy in the world. No panting or heavy breathing, nah, you could do this forever and never get tired. You snuggle deeper into your duvet, all the better to dream out your…dream. Only to wake up with a disappointed grunt as you realise that you’ve just wasted 20 minutes running in your dream, when you could have been running for real! I’ve been trying get this novel to a point where I am satisfied with it for so long that I started dreaming that I was working hard on it. Words flying across my semi-consciousness, feeling awesome as inspiration splashes out from my fingertips onto an imaginary page, only to wake to the fact that it was all a dream >sigh<.
As I write my first ever article, for my first ever blog, I sit with a slice of cake, congratulating myself on taking this huge step. You see, I’ve wanted to start a blog for over a year now; even my husband has stopped asking me about it. I’ve read so many blogs on how to write a blog; countless hours poring over what to do and what not to do and in the end I can safely say that I am none the wiser. I’ve battled with fear; of failure, of the unknown of just about anything (what if no one reads it? What if no one likes it? How will I ever have time to write? I barely have time to breathe!). I’ve now settled into another type of fear, fear of looking back five years from now and wondering why I didn’t just do it. I have a story to tell and if the lessons touch even one person, then it would have been worthwhile. Hopefully, I will look back in a year or two and be glad that I took the plunge.
I would like to invite you to share my love (you know what I mean) of writing and maybe my love of cake. Please look out for my next post, an excerpt from my untitled book.
I’m Bolaji Eyo. Welcome to my blog!9 by